Dr Cyberpoodle's Problem Page - All Your Troubles Dealt With (Possibly) Last updated 23/8/07
DR. CYBERPOODLE'S PROBLEM PAGE ''' by Doctorcyberpoodle, 23rd August 2005 "Welcome to my problem page. Please post your problems here and I will try to advise you". ---- '''Basmati or plain rice? Doctor, your advice please. Basmati because it smells nice. People don't appreciate my selfless campaign to depose King Danny and destroy everything he's worked for. Maybe people don't understand the true strength of your feelings...I recommend you talk to Relate. I have a problem; the voices in my head keep disagreeing - now I don't know what to do. The solution is simple - listen only to the loudest.... I am addicted to cheese, but I live in a part of the world where the nearest cheddar is six hundred kilometres away. Should I move and give in to my addiction or should I take up smoking? Well the addiction to cheese is healthier than the addiction to smoking, so I think that as long as you are not an artery-clogging 6-blocks-a-day-kinda guy then I would move house and enjoy! Do you think talking to yourself is a sign of madness? Sorry I didn't reply sooner...I was having a nice conversation with myself and I went off on a tangent.....No no no! After all, everybody else talks to you don't they? I believe that talking to oneself is a basic human right. Doctor, I've got to do a pole dance at 9pm tonight, but I've pulled my hamstring and I'm not sure if I'll be able to gyrate properly. Any advice please? Ah yes! Douse your groin with scented oil then do a few pelvic thrusts to loosen the ailing area. I see this problem a lot. Doctor, do you have any cures for cold feet? *another correspondent interjects* or cold hands? My hands always get cold when I'm on the computer...which is most of the time heh heh. I do actually....after you take a bath or a shower run freezing cold water over your legs and feet for a couple of seconds...it is good for your circulation. Doctor! I've got a turkey strapped to my leg and I can't make it go away! I've asked the people at large but they seem to be very unhelpful. How can I get rid of it? (There's a scooby snack in it for you). Threaten it with a Christmas cracker....I can prescribe you a sachet of bread sauce if symptoms persist. I fear that my hairline is receding, in later life - what should I do? There are some very sophisticated transplant options open to you these days, although they CAN be expensive. You could always carry a piece of coal around and 'chalk in' the bald patches as necessary? Think a transplant may give better results though. Is not having problems a problem in itself or am I overthinking the lack of thought? Perhaps you should take up a hobby...maybe croquet? IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM YOU WOULD LIKE DOCTORCYBERPOODLE TO SOLVE, PLEASE CLICK 'DISCUSSION' AT THE TOP OF THE PAGE, ENTER YOUR PROBLEM AND THEN CLICK ON THE TAB TO 'SAVE PAGE'. This page was inspired by an original thread by doctorcyberpoodle, to be found here. ---- Return to The Guardian Angel